Sunday, May 31, 2009
Starting shift work @ 11:03 PM
I will be officially starting shift work from tml onward. Tat means i will not have weekends off often that i use to have. so sad. Really hope i can cope wif the ward routine very soon.
Have been in the ward for 4 days morning shift last week. Morning shift went smoothly for 3 days. Actually i suppose to follow a senior enrolled nurse or she suppose to guide mi. But i didnt follow her. I did everything myself, pretending to be a staff there for quite sometimes. knowing my work what i suppose to do n knowing all the routine. Because she dun guide mi, leaving mi alone n not telling mi what to do etc. Really hate her. I only been there for less then a week. But feeling great not letting her to guide mi coz she is damn strict n irritating, keep nagging n nagging at other ppl... everyone respect her as she is old can be my ah ma le. but everyone dun like her to nag n nag.
3 days went smoothly, some staff say i learn very fast, cope with the routine quite well and also not the lazy type. Eventhough sometimes i stand there like a status coz i really dun know what to do. But still able to know the routine well. Tat gains my confident of working on. i know i will try hard to maintain n do better.
But until Fri then i know i still so SOTONG & USELESS!!!! really felt lost when it come to emergency cases. Wanted to help the staff there but dun know what to help n how to help. REally feel extremly lost at ther time. Really very stress up. Want to help them but yet like making more jobs for them. Really stress. I really dun know what to do. until i stand there looking at other patient. REally felt that i am such a useless person. I really DUN KNOW WHAT TO DO.. FEELING LIKE GIVING UP.
i know i shouldnt be thinking about eveything so soon. coz its only the 1st week there. but i really felt useless n lost. I dun know when can i cope with everything soon. I really dun know. -pray hard- PLEASE HELP MI!!!! I want to have a BIGGER BRAIN to contain as much things as possible. I really want to help.
